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| Home > Teacher Articles > Teaching Articles > An ADD Case Study: What Does it Mean to "Fail"? |
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The morning of the test, Josh felt good. He had plenty of rest the night before, he ate a good breakfast, and he was ready to ace his Economics test. He got to the classroom, ready to go, and when the test was handed out and he flipped through it, he froze. The test was four pages long, with short answer questions, math problems, and an essay. Even though he had studied so hard, Josh started to doubt himself. He did his best to push past the anxiety and overwhelm and finish the test. Then he went back to his dorm room and slept. He was physically and emotionally spent. A week went by before Josh got his test back. It was a B. He had studied so hard, he knew the material, and yet all he got was a B. He was crushed. "I did the best I could, I worked so hard to overcome this test-taking fear, and I failed." "What exactly did you fail at?" I asked. "I got a B," he replied. "I put so much work into that test that I should have got an A." For Josh, it was very easy to look at the situation and see failure. He wanted an A. He wanted to prove to himself, his parents, and his professor that he could ace this test. And Josh was so busy holding himself up to unrealistic expectations, that he completely missed his successes: 1. He stuck to the structure that we created for him. 2. He developed excellent study habits to prepare for the test. 3. He got a B! He answered approximately 80% of the questions correctly, when just a month ago he wasn't passing the class. I pointed this out to Josh and, although he listened, he only half-heartedly agreed. Then, two days ago, I got this email from Josh: "Dear Jen, I got my philosophy test back today and guess what, I got an A-! I thought about what you said and realized that I have been doing really good studying this semester and I am doing better than I ever have. My dad is so excited about my B and A-. Thanks for pointing it out because sometimes its hard to see the good stuff." I agree. Sometimes it is hard to see the good stuff - whether you're a student, an artist, an office worker, a business owner, or a parent. When that happens, look harder. Even if you "fail," you'll still learn something about yourself or the situation you're in. And if you're learning, then you're really not failing, are you...? This story was shared with Josh's permission. Jennifer Koretsky is a
Professional ADD Management Coach who helps adults manage their ADD and
move forward in life. She encourages clients to increase self-awareness,
focus on strengths and talents, and create realistic action plans. She
offers a 90-day intensive skill-building program, workshops, and private
coaching. Her work has been featured in numerous media, including The
New York Times Magazine and The Times (UK). |